Checking up.

I feel horrible. Maybe it was the 8 servings of mashed potatoes I just consumed, or the fact my mind is screaming failure inside my head. I want to go back in my life and think things through, get finished with school before children, and maybe reconsider my life with Andrew. I have been happy, completely in love with him, and then I'm screaming to get out. I look at myself and think, if I had just been strong enough to leave him when I had the chance where would life be right now? Big downfall...I wouldn't have Kaylin. Thinking about not having her makes my heart drop, but I wouldn't of had her to begin with, so I wouldn't of felt that way. Anyway I can't go back, and now I have an extra appendage to take care of, and I have to give her everything. Should I leave him? Go out and live my life and try to make it alone? Or should we stay together, sparing our daughter's happiness, and letting go of mine. Her's is way more worth it, but the fighting sometimes gets carried away right in front of her, and I remember way back when that the same fighting Andrew and I do, ruined my perception of my parents. So what do I do? Live with mom and possibly leave everything I have built so far? Even if it's just a rock pile? I wish God would give me the strength to do what's right. Even when I know in my mind what really is right for me. decisions decisions decisions..